Phatté

2011-08-12T23:33:00.007+05:30

Lokpal, corruption Indian governence
.....the anna hazare uprising and upcoming fast.....

I saw this very emotional and inspiring talk(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2CHcKlIsvAQ&sns=em) by Arvind Kejriwala. This was the first time, movement angainst corruption with Anna Hazare as front face, really moved me. One can see genuine concerns of this group. I seriously considered, shutting down of office for one week starting from Aug 16 in support of the cause. However more I thought of this, i realized that there are some fundamental flaws in Anna's school of thought. May be my reasons are petty excuses to avoid loss of business but I could not convince myself to be partof this non-cooperation movement. The fundamental premises of the movement is that corruption is cause of all evil. This sounds plausible due to rampant and overwhelming corruption around us. However I'm not convinced about that. If I think about it, entreprauners like me would have no way to get their task done without prevelant corruption in the system. A governement employee has almost no incentive to work hard or infoact to work at all. There is no individual to be blmed for that, the PSU system is designed such that its inevitable that the system would be inefficient. Corruption is a way to get things done quickly and efficiently in this system. I have this nasty feeling that removing corruption from current system will make the system even worse. Obviously corruption is bad but the disease should be treated from the root cause. Strong lokpal is like doing chemotherapy of a person suffering from leukemia. This might cure the patient but in all probability, the patient will die a painful death. I dont think this a risk worth taking, especially when economy is growing and our patient is developing internal strength to deal with diseases. I feel steps taken by current and pasf government in this regard are more pragmatic. As an entreprauner struggling with system for last six years, i can see some subtle changes. Everything is becoming online, reducing the requirement to deal with revered babus. The much celebrated UID project although largely unclear but gives hope. People tell me NREGA is a success. The process of taxation is becoming less taxing.
Having said that, I must add that the movement has noble intetions. It looks like that the whole Anna team is really passionate to do good for the nation. People and goverrnment is raising issues like how do they represent people, not elected, parallel government and all that crap. The indpendence movement had natural leaders who took initiative to fight the system. Same is the case with them. I've no doubts that they will be honest and good lokpals. Just like Jawaharlal and his contempories. The polotics was a noble profession till Shastri. II think the script went wrong when next generation Indira Gandhi came to power, who incidentally was not supported by Nehru to lead the country. Similarly these first lokpals who are fighting for the cause would in all probability do a great job and perhaps improve the system. But the task is momentous and I'll go with technology and downsizing of administrative system rather than sending jail to about 25% population of the country.

2010-06-24T12:05:00.005+05:30

Marketing meetings - code of conduct
.....general fundas on marketing, based on my startup experience of 4-5 years.....

2010-03-16T00:21:00.007+05:30

2 Minute Standup Comedy at Vir Das Show
.....video of a stand up routine performed by me.....

2007-05-06T18:39:00.013+05:30

Trek to Dodital
.....About a small trek on this lonely planet.....

2007-03-21T20:38:00.000+05:30

Kavi and his ego goes to White Castle
.....about getting low by getting high.....

Me sad :(

Inspired from the compliments that Akshat Kaul wrote on my last blog I decided to post something on this page. Then as a matter of habit I started reading the blogs that I follow, to get an idea of what's going on in blogdom. I read a sad news. My lady love on the blog-world got married. Sayesha......Khair, ab to gayee kudi (atleast for 4-5 year, I guess)

I also read two small but very intersting posts by Jaat . In his blog White Lighthe talks about post joint discussions. I also had a good dose of bhaang (Bhaang and dope are in same family, I guess) this holi. It was quite an experience. Thats what I'm gonna talk about in this blog.

On the holi morning I had decided that I'm not going to take Bhaang. I vividly remember last year due to bhaang, my body was trying to collpase and I had to stretch myself all night to avoid my anhilation. Also, this time, next morning I had to go for Ads' sangeet function, so it wont be a good Idea. As fate has it I was completely high by noon. The main problem with bhaang (or dope) is that your mind is working fine but the nerves that control your body are badly effected. So you know that you are in a bad shape but you can not do anything about it. I'm not sure everybody has it but I was able to see myself from a third person's view. I saw myself, how other people will see me as a person. What I saw was not something I like. I realised that I'm a very bad person. I'm a selfish person with hollow morals and adjustable values. I don't want to admit that to myself but thats the truth.

We all men (not women*) live with an illusion that we are at the centre of this universe. No matter how insanely illogical this thought is, but each one us believes so. We are all narcisist. But that's not a bad thing because without this illusion we will not have a logical reason to live. Bhaang that day, was somehow able to remove this layer of illusion. It was the saddest day of my life. I was sad not only because I realised how bad a person I'm, how meaningless my life is but also because I knew that the layer would be back after the effect of bhaang goes away. That's exactly what happened.

*I say men bacause I think women have different illusions that gives them reasons to live. (My hypothesis is that) They live in an illusion of love and compassion. (Much more logical illusion)

That day I drove 25 KM's in effect of bhaang, it was also the scariest drive of my life. But I knew I had to reach home to be able to go to Alwar next morning. Still arranging a taxi and calling up people who would join me in taxi was too much of a task. I just called dad, "Dad I had too much bhaang, please arrange everything" . I was able to do that because I did not had my empty pride to stop me.

2006-09-16T14:04:00.000+05:30

Silence took over
.....A poem.....

2006-08-10T19:59:00.000+05:30

Freakonomics
.....analysis of why all smart girls seem to go around with rather bad choices.....

I was discussing with Khemka what write on my new post. Since he is reading freakonomics these days his suggestion varied from weird to outrageous.
'Write about something which is not obvious but is obviously obvious"

'Write about god without talking about god'

Anyways I got the gist of his suggestions. Here's my freokonomical analysis of why all smart girls seem to go around with rather bad choices. What I mean by bad choices in politically correct manner is that generally these guys are outright losers. At the outset I must add there are always few exception to any observation. Please assume, whoever you are, you are an exception.

The theory is rather simple. Essentially if you look at from the perspective of a girl, "which guy to go around ?" is a pure investment decision. Really, its like which stock to buy (retail investor) or which company to acquire(private equity player). In our case analogy of a private equity player is closer, because private equity player takes majority stakes in the company and also gains management role in running of the company after investment. All intelligent investment decision has a very essential rule: always invest in deals which are under valued, no point in going for shares of companies with high valuation. So you see guys which are successful in conventional sense, are good looking and have mental balance are straight away striked off. A Company which is showing growing profits each year, is operating in a lucrative market domain and has good management systems would do well for itself. But its share price is bound to be on a higher side and its rather unlikely that its going to rise any higher. A smart investor looks for sick companies with some potential. A smart girl looks for losers with some potential. A smart investor regularly monitors the performance of the company for some time before investing. If the investor is huge, obviously the company management visits the potential investor regularly and makes presentation on its performance. A smart girl talks (usually on the phone) with the prospective boy friend for hours before committing. After investment this regular monitoring continues and is added with active role in making key decisions for the company.

Well, you might say that same rules should hold true for guys too. And all smart guys should go around with rather bad choices. That doesn't seems to happening. You see there is a fundamental difference in investor mentality. Girls look for long term investments, on the other hand guys tend to prefer short term investments. The perfect investment for a guy would be analogous to day trading. You invest in the evening and are through with returns by next morning. When Warner Buffet few days back said that the market is designed to transfer money from active to patient, he was answering a more deep rooted question of why females enjoy supremacy in the relationship market.

2006-08-01T00:26:00.000+05:30

Dead Man’s Chest
.....It’s interesting to see how internal thoughts are manifested in to everything around you......

The conflict with my conscious that I had mentioned in my last blog has been resolved for about 2 weeks now. I’ve given up my seat in IIM Lucknow. The Lucknow chapter is finally over. It has lingered in my life for more than a year now. I’ve been thinking of getting back to blogging, but I’ve been genuinely busy last few weeks. Also like many things in life, writing is a bit of habit, its easy to write if you keep posting. It becomes harder if you become irregular. Today I’m sitting here in pune without much to do, I can take out time to overcome this inertia. I now hope to post regularly on this page, let us see how it turns out.

It’s interesting to see how internal thoughts are manifested in to everything around you. They say, when you are in love, it seems all the literature by mills & boon gang is written with you as protagonist (unfortunately I’ve never been in love & fortunately I’ve never read mills & boon, that’s what I’ve heard). I recently saw Pirates of the Caribbean – Dead man’s chest it seemed to depict my dilemma. Captain was abandoning his ship, black-pearl, on a lifeboat to save himself from the curse of Devey Jones. He looked weak, scared and uninspiring. He lost his hat toward the start of the movie and kept looking for a new hat. He was losing trust and respect of his pirate companions on the ship. His compass which is supposed to show the direction to one thing he truly wanted had gone berserk. He didn’t know what he wanted. Obviously he knew he wanted rum, but that was about it.
Toward the end of the movie he returned to his ship. That sea monster coughed up his hat to him. So he got his hat back. He took out his sword and plunged to fight with that monster. That was a truly inspiring moment that was the only moment in the movie when captain looked the way he is supposed to look.
Now we will have to wait for a year for release of the next sequel to see what happens next. I think I’m in a very similar position I’m back on my ship, I’ve put on my hat back, taken my sword out and I’m out fighting Lestrygonians and the Cyclops and the Poseidon. In about a year time I’ll also know the outcome of this battle. Since Pirates of the Caribbean is a fiction and Jack Sparrow is our hero we can safely assume that he will fight all odds to victory. Obviously I can’t be sure about that in my case.
Anyway, captain goes down with his ship.

2006-07-06T15:04:00.000+05:30

Print digital photos
.....about a new startup on the block.....

This is one post which has been in my drafts section for a long long time now. I've been thinking for a long time to write about his startup i-tasveer on my blog page. Its a startup started by a group of my friends. I can not provide much publicity for www.itasveer.com from my blog page which has zero page rank. But, since I've been among the most extensive users of i-tasveer I can sure provide an honest review.

I really liked the simple and intuitive interface offered by this site. The service it offers (taking print of digital phtographs through net and get it delivered anywhere in India) is obviously quite useful but the strong point of the site lies in its implementation. Lately lot of websites have come up for sharing online photos. Flickr being the most prominent. I started to use I-tasveer for this purpose because it was built in my backyard. But later when I tried other established names, I found they are just a bit too complicated for my taste and understanding. Initially I thought why would anybody like to take printouts of photos in computer? Wouldn't they rather see it on computer. It really doesn't works that way, now I'm regular in taking prints and sending them to my parents & relatives. Its just so damn convenient.

This startup was built with a two job model with most of the founding members working on it part time while doing different day jobs. What they have come up is quite amazing and inspiring.

Its good to blog after a long time. My last post on this page seems like a long long time ago. Why the hell such a long break? I might say that lot has been going on in my life. I'm continuously shuttling between Lucknow and Delhi and trying to board two boats at the same time. That's a valid excuse but deep down I know the real reason is something else. I'm having a conflict with my consciousness. I'm carrying a guilt and I just dont want to face my inner self, let alone writing my thoughts in public domain. Some people will argue to write about the conflict and this will help me rationalize. I would rather resolve my conflict and soon I'll be back with a clear conscience.

2006-06-19T19:26:00.000+05:30

Mere Pitaji is too good
.....why I think my dad is greatest.....

2006-06-15T21:18:00.000+05:30

Crossroads of life
.....about a dillemma I'm facing these days.....

2006-06-07T21:43:00.000+05:30

Ingrediants of a good party!!
.....about a rocking party I hosted yesterday.....

Yesterday I hosted a kind of wild party. Today, its rather funny to see aftereffects of the party on all those who attended yesterday. Chummi kee jeeb uske gale main chipak gayee hain however this hasn't stopped him from his charectristic blah blah blah. Varun can not move much coz his back hurts. Bombs was somehow subdued today before diappearing somewhere. I think I've a hairline fracture in my right shoulder but I'm waiting for hangover to go away than I'll think about that seriously. But I am seriosly thinking on ingrediants that made it a good party, perhaps these ingrediants can be used again in the next dish, that would be fun. Let me try to ducument it here for future reference.

People

Formal and Professional people are strict no no. Uptight people should be avoided but usually when party rocks, they cut loose (like me:)). Obviously party time people are made for such parties. Number of people can vary from 10 to 30, after that it becomes a bit of crowd. There should be atleast 3 girls otherwise it would be an all boys party and no matter what, all boys parties are always sad. What about all girls party? Well.....will need an opinion on that, haven't experienced that but as a concepts sounds a bit sad. So atleast 3 girls and atleast 1 boy (1 boy in an all girls party can never be bad, can it? )

Booze

No you can not have a good party without booze. There should be lot of it, infinite for all practical purposes. There should be a bit of everybody's taste, However kind of booze matters a bit only in beginning after a while it all becomes the same. Cigerettes are absolutely optional but should be avoided due to safety hazards. Dope and other stuff.... well, not recommonded for a lively party consuming them requires too much effort and as headline of every stupid paper in town will tell you there are few associated risks.

Music

Music can make any dull party a rocking party and vice versa. Just like refree in good match of soccer never gets noticed similar is with music. Music should be such that you dont even think about it because you are too damn busy dancing. I'm trying to recall I remember gilasi number was played i remember few songs from rang de basanti and perhaps few from bluff master but seriously that coulndn't have carried us for 4 straight hours, there's a huge void. That damn DJ made our party rocking. For first time I'm having respect for a profession which I thought was really lame and I would like to take back all the jealosy I had for all those DJ's who get all the nice looking girls.

Abhee I've to go, rest of the things I'll write later. I just got a sad news. Party is over.

2006-05-22T19:57:00.000+05:30

What is a startup?
.....definition of startup, as I perceive it now.....

2006-05-15T19:55:00.000+05:30

How to kill a lion
.....about how my friends, with whom I am living these days will kill a lion.....

2006-04-30T21:22:00.000+05:30

Fear of Corpses
.....about my rafting trip to rishikesh and a deep rooted fear.....

One of the greatest regret of my life is mujhe yeh saali Theory of relativity kabhee samajh nahi aayee. Einstein kee jo layman ke leeye explanation thee (the one in which he compares time spent with a pretty girl as opposed to time spent with your ass on fire) bhee kuch khaas palle nahi padee. Yesterday, I along with Kalia, Bombs & Chumms had this one day long rafting trip to Rishikesh. It was bit different from previous trips coz, this time we took a car and drank beer all the way to the spiritual land and absolute bliss. This time I did jumped from that damn cliff. And this time we did had the good fortune of having pretty girls on the raft, for company. One of those girls was a French chick named Lolita!! Pretty much, as good as it gets. As per Einstein's theory it should’ve felt like an hour, but it feels like it has been a week, since I last came to office.

Why this grave title "Fear of Corpses" for this seemingly jovial blog?

Well ..... I was sitting cross legged in the front if the raft toward the end of the ride. Despite the engaging company, my thoughts drifted toward my last rafting trip. The story is like this: Once upon a time (few years back), I went for rafting with Rahul & Rahul. At about eight kilometers downstream from Shivapuri, we saw a lot of people standing on the left bank of the river with weird expression on their faces (mixture of disdain and pity). One of them called for us and shouted “Abhee abhee ek piyakkad gaya hai neeche, save him if you can”. Guide on our raft refused to go, stating there might be strong undercurrent beneath the surface. I felt a strong urge to jump in to water, but I did not. We waited for about ten minutes and tried in vain to poke our paddles in water. We waited for him to die.
Why the hell did I not jump? Fear of death! I don’t think so; I’m rational enough to understand that in no condition I would have died, had I jumped with a rope around my waist. Later, I figured it was my fear of corpses. I was fortunate in my life till that time, not to witness any death. I had never touched a dead body. I was simply petrified to jump in water and see a dead body staring at me.

I witnessed this fear again, on another trip with family. A maruti 800 car was moving in front of our vehicle; suddenly it took a strange turn and fell in to a ditch. We stopped the car, I ran toward the ditch to find that the car was almost completely submerged in a sort of quagmire. I was again jolted by a deep fear of dragging out dead bodies from that sludge. I was almost completely rooted at that time. A strong built sardarji, plunged in to that ditch, with purpose. Seeing his strength, I too stepped forward. Together, we saved both the lives in that car. It felt good, but I still didn’t come over my fear. This I know coz, recently, a friend of mine, whom I’ve known for about fifteen years died in a road accident. It was a loss, I was really sad. But, more than that I was really afraid to see his dead body. I was almost trembling, as his dead body was taken out from ambulance. During his cremation, I gathered my courage to place his body on pyre, participate in rituals to bid him a respectfull farewell. Right now i don't know whether or not I've overcame my fear. I feel I'm doing better.

On this trip, an intersting thing happened. On the golf course rapid, which is like the most vociferous rapid on the route, one guy (a geman) fell in to river. Kalia, quite heroically pulled him back on raft. This time around I was not afraid, it was all just so fast, it all happened before I could react. I just kept rowing. My fear was not tested on this trip. But it sure was a god damn fun trip :)

2006-04-20T15:51:00.000+05:30

Depressing Nonsense
.....views on 50% OBC reservation issue.....

2006-03-18T14:29:00.000+05:30

Karan Singhania ko apne baap se khundas kyoon thee?
.....Rang De Basanti Trivia.....

Karan Singhania is that chain smoker in Rang De Basanti, who somehow is never able to take more than 2-3 puffs from the numerous cigarettes he lights up during the movie.

I believe his character was one of the finest depicted in hindi cinema, to date. Few days back I was having this discussion with Khemka at a CCD. The question was why was is Karan so pissed off with his dad ?
The popular answer is that his dad doesnt gives him time and is trying to implant his aspirations on poor Karan. That to me doesn't sound plausible. Karan's character doesnt needs to be held in arms and told " I love you beta". Also his career aspirations of studying in US is not in conflict with what his dad wants from him. If there is no conflict why is this constant confrontation?

The key scene in the movie is when the Anupem Kher appears for the first time. The confrontation takes place, kher gets busy on phone (Baarat main band waale bhee khaate hain....waala dilogue). Then Karan goes inside and looks at a photograph in his drawer.
Whose photograph was that?
The popular answer(read khemka's answer) is that it was his mother. That to me again doesnt sound plausible. Why would he keep her mother's photograph in drawer and not on his desk. Also that was a photograph of a young lady, if his mother has died that young, why would he still remember her?
Though it may sound arbitrarily melodramatic, I think that was a photograph of some girl he fell in love with and it couldn't work out because of his dad. It seems that the girl was older than him and she herself backed off because of Karan's dad. That's the root of the whole confrontation.
Bhai Wah!! Poori kahani ka kachra kar deeya.
That sounds so clichéd. But, there is a difference: our hero is pissed with his dad but still he doesn't becomes a rebel. He still stays with his dad and puts off his cigarette moment he sees his dad sitting on the porch. His atonement with father in oedipus' terms happens for a higher reason and not for "love of his life". He becomes a rebel and kills his father like Oedipus did for a love much deeper than infatuation or lust.

Does it make sense?? :o

2006-02-25T14:18:00.000+05:30

Calvin & Garfield
.....Arbit Bakwaas.....

2006-02-22T22:31:00.000+05:30

Waiting for Tonight
.....about much awaited chelsea Vs. Barca fixture.....

2006-02-18T19:56:00.000+05:30

Keertan Rock Concert
.....about music and unified theory.....

2006-02-11T18:46:00.000+05:30

Comments on "How to do something you like?"
.....comments on an article by paul graham.....

"How to do something you like?" is the latest post on the blog page of Paul Graham.
This guy is has an amazing clarity of thoughts, its a delight to read him. I'm sure, if he publishes a book compiling all his articles that would be an instant best seller. Thats the reason I keep visiting his website and quickly read any new post before he decides to publish them and removes from the internet {Waise now as I'm thinking over it, I'm realising that's a really stupid botheration in this age of open source}. Anyways in the article he explains why most people are not able to do something they like despite the fact that its most obvious thing to do.

He talks about three powerful forces leading us astray. The first is the conditioning that we get from childhood that work is supposed to be pain. My inherent lathargy and reluctance to work in general on painful and boring stuff has saved me from this conditioning. The second force that he mentioned was money. It sure is a powerful force but since I'm working at a job which pays me much less than what I can earn otherwise, I think this force hasn't affected me much either. This I believe is due to my upbringing in an environment in which money was treated the way it should be. It was not something which was very important, neither it was something which was to be treated with disrespect. It was just a thing to buy food, clothes and video game coins. The third thing he mentioned was prestige. Well prestige does have its effects on me. Sadly, I do think about what other people will think about what I'm doing. That's the reason I've not been able to take singing classes despite a deep desire to be able to sing aloud without feeling embarrassed. He defines prestige as consideration of what people other than your friends will think. As I'm writing this blog I'm thinking what some random person reading it, will think about me. Mr. Shishir Gupta get this phony prestige thing out of your mind.

One thing that Paul mentioned in his article was really heartening; if you don't know what you like then that's not such a serious problem. What the hell do I like? I remember myself, in my early teens arguing with my mother why being a movie director is not such a bad career choice. That's one job that has fantasized me since childhood. Later in my life when I realised, other tertiary advantages of the job, like casting couch, that further added to the charm. Lately I've felt that had I been born around Manchester or in Brazil I would have been a professional footballer. People who have seen me play will find this really funny, but the fact of matter is that I really enjoy it. I started very late, when I was already 22 or something. I feel that in the limited time that I have spent on football field, I've learned alot. I'm at the right places in the ground at the right time, I've developed decent ball skills, I can run fast with the ball. The most important thing is that I really enjoy playing. But who doesnt? Every other person would like to be a movie director/footballer/fly jet planes.

I don't think I've met anybody in my life so far who genuinely loves his job. May be Anjum Rajabali, the scriptwriter I met did, but he took his time and did lot of ping pong thing in his career to finally get on to scripting. I thought KD really did, reading his blog I realised that he is also searching. The suggestion made by Paul that early in life you should choose a job that enables to do a lot of things, makes a lot of sense. I felt really happy for my current choice after reading the article. In a startup company there's lot be done and you can choose what would you like to do. Had I continued with my job or gone for MBA that would have been really sad. Hurrrah.. I made a right choice, and I'm not doing bad compared to people I've known :). Articles by this guy has always this elating effect on me. He kind of validates my attitude toward life, which I myself would never be able to do.

2006-02-04T19:10:00.000+05:30

My First Blog
.....why I'm getting on to blogdom and other related issues.....

What sense does it make? The blogging thing?
What purpose does it solve?
If you have to write why not on a word processor and keep it in your hard disk?
I think these were the questions that kept this phenomenon of blogging from catching up, much before than it actually did. Its imperative of every blogger to answer these questions (to himself atleast) before start posting. My answers are not philosophical, they are more to do with convenience.

It's so damn easy.
I'm of the kind who like to travel light in the journey of life. Species of my kind like to keep minimal load attached to us. This web thing is a real blessing; a lot of stuff collected during the journey can be kept virtual.
I would have to write well, with proper thought and all. Its there for everybody to see, I need to cover up my stupidity with proper rhetoric.
It's a nice timepass. Vella that I am, it gives me something to be occupied with (something i like)

That was cool. I came up with good unambiguous reasons. Perhaps not in the right order, but I think they are more or less the top 4 reasons. Writing does make your thoughts clear.

What would I blog about?. I think the title 'phatte' of the blog does gives some clarity on what I intend to write. The fact of the matter is that whatever I write, I would like to be read. There is no real fun in writing if people are not willing to read you. Easier said (read written) than done. Other than that I can not decide anything. I believe that decision should be made only when there is no other choice but to make one. Its like a corollary to "Don't fix it, if it ain't broken". This is one of the golden rules of my life.

Why 'cacofnix'; well that’s becoz of one my other golden rule, which says “ Use cacofnix as a web identity, wherever a login is needed”. It’s not that I’m a paying homage works by Goscinny & Uderzo(I'm just a smalltime fan); neither do I identify too much with the character cacophonix (I just sing like him). The thing is that either my given name is very common or there is one particular bastard by the name of Shishir Gupta who has taken up login at around 300 terabyte data on world wide web. Whatever is the case now I don’t even bother to try out permutation and combination of my name, I simply resort to cacofnix to save time and energy.

Why am I answering all these non essential and un-interesting questions? They are more to get me moving and start posting.

Chalo then, bie byes.